Deal breakers

I'm not an expert on dating, but I play some online. When I say dating so I do not mean that the other person is your boyfriend / girlfriend. What I mean is that you've been out with this person a few times and enjoyed their company. And perhaps one day they become your second half.

You learn a lot about themselves and what they want from their second half. We all have a checklist of things that we want in a partner, from education to religion to the common interests. The on more dates you go on, and the more time that passes, the more controlling. The list gets shorter, things reorganized. Things that once was the deal breaker is now negotiable, and things that once were okay now deal breaker. These vary from person to person. Guys I met have helped shape this checklist and I have learned a lot about myself. A guy showed me that it is an important issue to have a steady job and not live with your parents. Another learned that I need a little personal space during the first few weeks of dating. A third showed me that chemistry is an extremely important issue and without it nothing happens. Finally, my current partner showed me the importance of communication.

Communication is important - in life, in every relationship, in dating. It starts on the website to communicate what you are looking for in a match and be honest about yourself. From there it progresses to the messages - through the website, SMS and other social media - and finally to the first meeting. It is important to be open about what you want and how interested you are in the other person if you are interested at all. Man struggles with communication, and it is something that I always work with. When two people are on the same side, things become a lot easier.